United States Ambassador Scolds Colleagues for Showing Up Drunk at United Nations Negotiations

by Colonel on March 5, 2013

“At a General Assembly budget committee meeting on Monday, the United States ambassador for management and reform at the UN stood up to scold his colleagues for always showing up drunk to negotiations. “There has always been a good and responsible tradition of a bit of alcohol improving a negotiation, but we’re not talking about a delegate having a nip at the bar,” said Joseph “The Fun Police” Torsella. “We make the modest proposal that the negotiating rooms should in future be an inebriation-free zone.”

Some diplomats spoke up after Torsella’s very public shaming and said it’s not uncommon for delegates to show up visibly drunk to negotiations. “On one occasion the note-taker who was meant to be recording the talks was so intoxicated he had to be replaced,” one unnamed diplomat told the press.

” — Adam Clark Estes, Copyright 2013 The Atlantic Monthly Group LLC

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